Don’t look back. 


Don’t stop,

Trust me,

Run as fast as you can,

Never look back.

Drink till your body shakes,

Mind blurs,

Eyes close, 

No regrets though,

Keep going,

Just don’t look back.

You’ve done them all,

Haven’t you? 

Numbing whatever pain you’re in,

Don’t stop, 

Never look back.
Boy after boy,

Girl after girl,

You’ve gone through them all,

Trying to fuck the pain away,

Maybe it’ll work this time,

The key?

Don’t look back.
Mind numb,

Body weak,

You’ve tried it all,

Nothing left,

You’ve destroyed yourself,

The only choice?

Looking back,


What a mess you’ve made

(perhaps avoidance is key after all).
Now my darling,

Turn around,

Keep walking,

And never ever look back,

After all, 

It’s too painful down there. 



With a mind endlessly racing,

And a heart constantly beating,

That beautiful brain of yours never seems to slow down,


In and out,


My darling.
A world so fixated on time,

Tick, tick, tick,

Never slowing down,

Not even for the ones in pain,


In and out,

That’s what the world needs,

Take a moment,

My darling,

Just breathe.
So caught up,

Barrier after barrier,

Problem after problem,

Being thrown your way,

How is anyone meant to keep up?

A world moving too fast,


Take a moment,

And breathe.


My Darling,

I hope it’s enough.
I can see your eyes fading,

A body close to giving up,

With a mind that’s slowing,

And a heart ready to stop,

You can’t possibly keep up,


My darling.

With nothing left,

Nothing but a broken world,

Filled with broken people,

Trying to keep up,


My darling,


Before it’s too late,

Before the world gives up on you.

(Just Breathe).




Filling rooms,




Pure happiness,



Music playing,



Rooms full of people,



What a thrill.


Step by step,

Joining in,



Fitting in,



Overflowing with laughter,

People entering,

Filling rooms.


All these people,

Full of life,

Surrounding you,

Rooms filling,

Heart breaking,

Life shattering.


People leaving,

Nobody left,

Nobody but you,

Rooms emptying,

Don’t you get it?

You were always alone.


Make A Wish.

“Make A Wish” you whisper,

Words I still hear so clearly,

Turning to face the clock,


So I do as you ask,

I make a wish.


“Make A Wish” you whisper,

It was my birthday after all,

Candle by candle

Light by light,

Slowly fading away,

With one left,

I do as you ask,

I make a wish.


“Make A Wish” you whisper,

Lights flickering across the night sky,

I’d never seen a shooting star before,

So I do as you ask,

I make a wish.


10 months later,

Your voice now nothing but a memory,

11:11 comes and goes,

Another birthday passed,

Witnessing shooting star after shooting star.


“Make A Wish” I whisper,

Each word tearing me apart,

Knowing my wish was impossible,

As I wished for you to stay,

Just as I always did.

Yet this time,

This time was different,

This time it was too late,

This time,

You were already gone.





Echoing your name,

They all want you back,

Pulling you apart,

Limb by limb,

Breaking you down,

Destroying every bit of you,

The only choice ~

Give up,

Let them consume you,

Let them become you,

Taking every inch of you with them,

Dragging you down.


Your thoughts,

Your wants,

Your needs,

All irrelevant.

What matters you ask?


Their opinions,

Their happiness,

Their desires,

Pretending they care for you,

Faking their interest,

Who do they think they are?


Don’t you get it?

No matter how loud you scream,

Nobody cares,

It’s all an act,

As if your opinion ever mattered.


Sit down,

Shut up,

Let them tear you apart.

(As if you had a choice).


A note to those who don’t understand. 

Have you ever watched a fire and wondered what it would feel like to jump right in?

Because I have.

Or have you ever watched the waves come crashing down and wonder what drowning would feel like?

Because I have.

Or have you ever held a pack of pills so tightly and wondered what it might feel like to take them all?

Because I have.

Or has it ever crossed your mind to take a blade to your wrist, wondering how deep you can push until you don’t feel anything?

Because I have.


Have you ever been driving and wondered what it would feel like to roll off the bank, drive into that power poll or roll right off that cliff?

Because I have.

So before you come around here, telling me who I am and who I am not. 

Take a step back.

And before you come over and start judging me, telling me my behaviour is “not me”.

Take a step back.

And before you even begin to reassure me that you “know what it feels like.”

Take a step back.

Take a step back, and ask yourself one simple question..

Have you ever wondered what it might feel like to just not feel anything anymore? 

Because I have. 

(You on the other hand,


You need to take a step back). 



A smile from ear to ear,

Eyes filled with life,

Her heart overflowing with love,

Dressed to perfection,

She couldn’t look happier,

That’s the plan though, isn’t it?

Another little game,

Nobody would ever suspect,

She was wearing a mask,

All of it – a lie,

Stripped back,

Look closer,

The smile begins to crack,

Eyes red raw,

A heart struggling to beat,

Mask unraveling,

Piece by piece,

Finally seeing what’s underneath,

Something so unbearable,

A person so close to dying,

A person so close to giving up,

Stop playing,

Stop acting,

Nobody believes such a childish act,

The moment people began treating her differently,

She knew her mask had faded,

Game over.

(Time to change masks).